Monday, June 23, 2014

Sunday June 22


Back to work today. I thought the weekend would feel a little longer but I was so tired all the time I just basically ate and napped.

Intake
Tofu breakfast hash
Portobello burger
Few chips
Pretzels, veg with hummus
Banana blueberry smoothie

Activity
Walk to work

Hydration
30ish oz.

Thoughts
I have the rest of this shift and 2 more and then I'm done with wards for the month. I'm pretty excited but I do feel like these next couple days are really standing in my way. I've been trying to think about ways to enjoy my life more right now without always waiting for the next break but it's really hard. I'm trying to think of moments to pause and be grateful:

1. Lying in bed in the cool morning with the fan on at the end of my shift.
2. Opening my jar of juice or smoothie
3. Petting my dog who's always happy to see me no matter the time of day
4. Putting on my scrubs and how comfortable they are

Ok that's a few. I'll keep trying.

Xoxo little birds

Saturday, June 21, 2014

Saturday June 21


The solstice today was fine but I hardly left the house.

I started the day with a breakfast date with my family. The watched a fair amount of TV, napped, and hosted dinner with more (different) family. Everybody's in town right now and it's a little overwhelming.

Intake
Oatmeal with strawberries
Leftover veggie fajitas
Sicilian pasta/baguette
Apple
Wine x2 glasses

Activity
Dog walk

Hydration
I actually did really poorly today - I didn't even think about it because I had the day off, but I probably had 20ish oz with various meals and none in between.

Thoughts
My day off is over way too fast, I work again tomorrow night and I feel like I did almost nothing but sleep and laundry. I'm so excited for the end of this stretch of work. I'm just done.

Xoxo little birds

Friday, June 20, 2014

Friday June 20


Tomorrow is summer! Officially anyway even though it's felt like summer here for a while. 

Also I reached the end of my 12 days in a row work stretch and woooooo finally have a day off.

Intake
Pastry
Apple
Veggie fajitas/chips
Bran flakes
Couple chocolate chips
Grapes
Wine x1

Activity
Dog walk and work walk

Hydration
I drank a ton of water at dinner cause the salsa was really hot but idk how much. Hopefully I hit my 48.

Thoughts
Well being on night shift I didn't really have my nightly ritual of posting and that did make it harder to remember exactly what I'd eaten and be accountable. Still, I tried to stay no ore than a day behind. When I woke up this afternoon knowing I didn't have to go in for a shift tonight and I could spend more time with my family it was a great feeling. It's late now and everyone else is sleeping, I'm going to head that way in about 20 mins, I'm just trying to soak up a little more quiet grateful time at the beginning of my weekend. See you soon,

Xoxo little birds

Thursday June 19


Intake
Pbj sandwich
Tofu scramble
Lo mein
Smoothie
Larabar

Activity
Walking to work

Hydration
40 oz. - 32 of which was an awesome jar of cucumber water

Thoughts
See the Friday post - as usual I have no idea what I was thinking yesterday.

Xoxo little birds

Wednesday June 18


Trying to include a few more fashion-y posts in addition to the usual nature/scenery.

I'm way behind on posts so I'll just get into it.

Intake
Pbj sandwich
Tofu scramble
Larabar
Banana blueberry smoothie
Salad
Pretzels/hummus

Activity
Walking

Hydration
40 oz

Thoughts
Idk - I'm behind so I'll put it all in the post that's for today...keep reading.

Xoxo little birds

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Tuesday June 17


So I find it kind of confusing to write about my day when I'm on night shift. I try to stick to talking about it in normal day hours - I just sleep in the middle of it. This morning (yesterday morning? See this is so confusing) I could barely stay awake for teaching I literally fell asleep in an almost one on one lecture, but idk what they expect when we're supposed to work for 13.5 hrs overnight and then come listen to a lecture.

Intake
Hashbrowns and fruit
Chips and hummus
Pasta with peas and marinara
Berries
Larabar
32 oz cucumber apple orange spinach juice

Activity
I walked home from work and back again. It was enough - I'm dead tired.

Hydration
Pretty ok? I'm still working on a bottle of water right now.

Thoughts
I am loving my juicer. I've taken 32 oz of juice with me to work each of my shifts this week and it's filling but also I think sits better with my digestion. Plus I'm getting in so many greens it's awesome. Overall I'm finding it really hard to be rested because I have to sleep during the day and I can't really stay asleep more than 6 hours. Don't get me wrong - 6 is great and it could be worse, but I just really need 7.5 to feel like myself. I depend on the light and it's confusing for me to sleep during the day instead. I'm overall ok. A lot of lifestyle goals go by the wayside when I'm on nights: I just try to survive, but I'm trying to find time to take good care of myself and enjoy the few hours I have when I'm awake and home to spend with family.

That's all I guess.

Xoxo little birds

Monday June 16


Ok so I'm just buried in the work right now but doing ok, late entry for yesterday.

Intake 
Pb banana toast
Berries
Chips/black bean corn salsa
Small pasta dish
Homemade juice

Activity
Nothing? Pretty sure nothing.

Hydration
Had quite a bit of cucumber water - so good!

Thoughts
The problem with late entries is that I don't really have anything to say because I'm about to do another post with what's going on right now, so I think I'll just get to that.

Xoxo little birds

Monday, June 16, 2014

Sunday June 15


Pic from the concert yesterday.

So today was weird as it always is when I start night shifts, because it feels like a day off until I go in to work at 5 pm. So now it's the middle of the night and I'm doing my daily post from work.

But it was a fun day, I slept in after being out late dancing, we went to Church, Costco, a farmers market, I tested out the juicer (so awesome), and then went to work.

Intake
Peanut butter banana toast
Black bean corn taco salad
Fresh lemon apple spinach juice
Larabar
32 oz fresh grape/kale juice

Activity
Nothing strenuous, but night shift is a fair amount of running around

Hydration
Very poor actually - probably like 20 oz? But there was fresh juice.

Thoughts
I'm so happy with my juicer, it was kind if a lot of pieces to clean but I learned some things already and the juice is so good. More importantly, I usually get really uncomfortable, gassy etc. over the night shift when I eat, I think because my stomach just isn't awake, but I had the juice starting around midnight and I think it's digesting way easier. I actually feel ok. I'm also surprisingly full. So yeah, juicing, happy. I still have 4 more hours for this shift to get crazy. We'll see.

Xoxo little birds

Saturday June 14




Had to work Saturday but it was still great after I got done. We went to an outdoor concert and there was fun dancing.

Intake
Smoothie
Salad, pretzels, fries
Black bean and corn salsa
Veggie burrito bowl: shared
Beer x2

Activity
Walk, vigorous swing dancing

Hydration
Did ok I think? Who knows I can't remember. This is the problem with being late on a daily post.

Thoughts
I was so tired by the time I made it to bed but I was so happy to go out, the dancing was so fun and it was overall a pretty good day.

Xoxo little birds

Friday, June 13, 2014

Friday June 13


Today at work was pretty rough. I cried in front of a patient which is embarrassing as hell, but worse I cried out of frustration and also because she said a series of things including "are you a real doctor? How long have you been here? You don't know the answers to any of these questions." And the truth is I was mad for her because I didn't agree with the plan and I couldn't explain it because it wasn't a good plan and I got pretty upset and then she was mean to me even though I was on her side and I lost it a little.

It's been a really awful time for me overall at work and I'm ready to just say screw it. If I didn't have so much debt I would probably quit.

Intake
Smoothie
Salad, pretzels with hummus
Banana
Quinoa stir fry
Beer

Activity
Walk to work. That's it.

Hydration
Had a nice tall Smartwater today - it really is awesome tasting water. Total about 40 oz.

Thoughts
So work was pretty bad and I'm dreading going back tomorrow. I'm tired and a little bit angry and I don't feel like me. But it is nice to have visitors and I just need to lay this day to rest.

Xoxo little birds





Thursday June 12



Late entry for yesterday. It was an ok day yesterday: my sister in law (I'm going to stop typing all that and just call her my sister from now on) arrived with her boyfriend and I'm so happy they're going to be in town this summer.

Intake
Smoothie
Veggie sandwich, fries
Apple
Out to dinner: bean tostada, few chips
Wine

Activity
5 min stretching and round trip to work, long walk with dog

Hydration
I think I hit my 64 oz.

Thoughts
I can't even remember what I was thinking yesterday, let's just move on to today.

Xoxo little birds

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Wednesday June 11


I'm so sorry I was so super negative yesterday - things were better today I guess.

My juicer arrived! I didn't really have enough produce so I haven't tried it out yet. I'm going to go to the store tomorrow and get crazy and I'm so excited.

Also my sister in law is coming to live with us tomorrow and my sister is visiting on Sunday and exciting things are happening and I'm ready to be happy. I'm so ready to be happy.

Intake
Smoothie - 32 oz is way better can't believe I went so many days with 12
Vegan quesadilla
Tomatoes
Peach
Beer
Sourdough bread with kale salad

Activity
Long walk this evening with husband and dog

Hydration
30ish oz. I've been waking up late and not even starting my day right with water. I think that might be a nice tiny goal for tomorrow.

Thoughts
I've been feeling like a disaster the past couple days, both emotionally and in terms of staying on top of what I need to accomplish. But I do think I can turn it around and I'm excited for what's next.

Xoxo little birds

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

Tuesday June 10


Work was absolutely awful. People were so fucking bitchy.

Instead of signing out people gave me snark about what was typed on the list.

Instead of helping me with an angry patient the person I asked said I should get a social worker and yelled at me when I was just trying to follow up and take care of people.

Everyone I work with keeps making backhanded sarcastic remarks about work not being done right.

But you know what? There's nothing wrong with the work I'm doing. I do great work. I'm not kidding. I work really hard but I'm also good at my job.

I got paged at 5:30 this morning while still in bed. Apparently they don't know how night shifts work. I am not on call. I do not start until fucking 6:30 and I think that's early enough.

I don't know how much longer I can take it. 

Intake
Bananas
Tofu salad
Tomatoes
Olives
Peach
Potatoes
Beer x1

Activity
None

Hydration
Not great. 20 oz. maybe

Thoughts
Ready to frickin bury this day. That's it. That's all. 

Xoxo little birds

Monday, June 9, 2014

Monday June 9


Enormous jar of water today.

I also made a much bigger smoothie today - about 30 oz. and that was a great choice.

I wish I could be home watching TV instead of at work where I am today but I should be grateful I have a job and that it's what I want to do. It's easy to get caught up in my own life and being tired.

Ok I started this post at work and now I'm home but whatever. I am now watching said TV and it feels nice. My feet are up and I'm excited about that.

Intake
Smoothie
Veggie sandwich
Grape tomatoes
Beer x1
Homemade pizza
Bowl raisin bran

Activity
None

Hydration
32 oz, but I'll have another 16 now. 

Thoughts
All right not so great on activity or water. Food was ok. Surprisingly I felt like a beer after work. Idk, pretty tired and work was bad. I'm going to sleep now.

Xoxo little birds


Sunday, June 8, 2014

Sunday June 8


I seriously had the laziest day it was crazy. Being hungover sucks.

My intake is also totally weird because I was super nauseous and then hungry until like 2 pm.

Intake
Banana
2 flatbreads plain
3 gold potatoes - baked
Grape tomatoes
Small bowl raisin bran with soy milk
Vegan chicken Parmesan pasta - cooked by my handsome man
Popcorn

Activity
None and zero. My head hurt way too much the whole day. Husband even did both dog walks.

Hydration
64 oz. It probably wasn't enough with my hangover but I am proud of myself.

Thoughts
Like I said, I think I'm off alcohol for a bit. I also feel kind of sad that I feel like I didn't spend my days off that well, but nothing I can do to fix that. I just have to go to work and try to do my best.

Xoxo little birds

Saturday June 7


I didn't post yesterday because I was out late at a party. I don't think I was super drunk but my hangover today was close the worst of my life. 

I need to break up with alcohol for a while.

Anyway this whole weekends been crazy lazy, just a lot of TV. Husband's been really productive but I haven't at all. I'm ok with it, I needed it I think.

Intake
Smoothie
Apricots
Grape Tomatoes
Lentil mix
Raisin Bran
Rice/More lentil mix
Apple
Few chips
2 beers
A lot of vodka/diet coke

Activity
Dog walk, 10 min yoga

Hydration
I did really well with that. I think I got to like 80 oz. I bought new 32 oz mason jars - way bigger than the  12 oz and that made it easier.

Thoughts
I really regret the amount I drank for the primary reason that I feel so shit right now. I've had the nausea and the headache and ugh just not good. It's really bad for my health and I think I need to take a break.

Be back later with today's post - hopefully

Xoxo little birds

Saturday, June 7, 2014

Weight Loss Steps


*trigger warning: this post is about healthy weight loss, but some people are triggered by any talk of weight loss so protect yourselves and fly away if you need to, see you next post*

I've been posting every day for a little while now but what I'm not sure is clear is that I haven't actually been working actively on weight loss - I try to eat at normal times, posting has been helping me not binge and not snack too much, but I'm not actually eating that healthfully and I'm not really trying to lose weight.

It's not that I don't want to - I have a wardrobe full of clothes that don't fit and summer's basically here and I want to feel comfortable again.

I should be clear: I am currently normal weight and for the amount of weight I want to lose I will also still be normal weight, it's just a matter of comfort.

So today I'm 129.6 (58.8 kg). I'm 5'4". This is the highest I've been in 5 years.
Goal weight: I don't actually care what the number is. I know in the past with the way I utilized both diet and exercise I liked the proportion of my body at 115-118 pounds, but if I do a lot more strength and put on more muscle this time that's fine, the number could stay the same, I just want to be able to wear my favorite jeans - then I'll know I'm back to feeling like me.

That said, I'm going to use the phrase "lose weight" to mean "get smaller" whether the number changes or not.

So what's the best way for me to lose weight?

1. Accountability is huge: I'm so grateful every time one of your comments comes to my inbox. I often don't get a chance to reply - frequently I'm looking from work - but it makes my day. 

I think I'm going to keep posting every day because I know it helps me stay on track and I like the way it gives me a minute to reflect on my day.

2. Planning. It's much easier for me to make a healthy choice when there are leftovers in the fridge I can take to work or healthy food available to grab. So even if it's the night before and not a week in advance, I'd like to try a little harder to plan for health. This is includes both meal planning and grocery shopping.

3. Hydration. I've already been tracking my daily hydration in my posts and I've really noticed a difference on days I drink more water. Since I started trying to drink more way back in march I also feel like my tolerance for dehydration has gone way down - I crave more water - so that's good. On a weight loss plan I'm going to increase my goal back up to 64 oz. a day.

4. Exercise. Exercise makes a huge difference in how I feel about my body, but in the past year I'd say the biggest change in my lifestyle compared to the previous 4 years is that I don't exercise regularly. It's down to time - I work about 70 hrs a week and my work days often start at 6:30 AM. It's not really an adequate excuse though. It's not like I work every second. There's no reason I shouldn't have time - but I do have to work to make it. I've always preferred to start my day with exercise, it wakes me up and the endorphins carry through the day. It doesn't have to be morning though. Even if I worked out after work, I just think it's important to put it back in my life. I have a gym membership that husband's been heckling me about - probably because I'm not sure I've been even once in 2014. I've never been much of a gym girl but since we moved here I had to try to come up with a new plan for a couple reasons. One is that it's really hot outside not that long after the sun comes up. We're in the desert at a mile above sea level. Also it's not very safe here compared to where we used to live in California, so running while it's dark isn't really an option like it used to be. Bottom line: I want to do some activity every day, at least 10 mins, and something strenuous at least 3x per week. And if I have to wake up at 4 or go to the gym after work then fine, I want to at least try to establish a new routine.

5. What I'm eating. This sort of goes with planning but I guess I could plan things that aren't the healthiest or best for me so I want to make this a separate category. Like I mentioned, I want to try eating 801010 raw, but I won't try to start that until my juicer arrives which could be a while. Realistically I know I won't be able to go fully raw right away, and I probably will end up ultimately doing raw til 4 or just back to high produce vegan, but I do want to give it a fair chance if I can. I think even if I don't make the transition to raw, I want to replace some unhealthy things with more fruits and vegetables.

Ok that was a little bit stream of consciousness. Let me simplify it.

Summary of Plans
1. Daily posts
2. Meal planning
3. 64+ oz. water
4. Exercise 10 min/day, strenuous 3x/wk
5. Healthy foods, high raw.

Okay that was waaaay longer than I was planning. Thanks for reading, and I'll see you later for my daily post.

Xoxo little birds



Friday, June 6, 2014

Friday June 6


I'm almost to the weekend. I don't know why I have an unheard of both days of the weekend off but I'm going to take it and run.

After this I have to work 12 days in a row so I'm really going to try to soak up the fun & sun this weekend.

Intake
Smoothie
Fries & salad
Diet coke - my first soda in ages
Out for Thai: fresh spring rolls, Thai tofu salad

Activity
I only walked to work this morning, husband picked me up because it was too hot to walk home.

Hydration
Not great. 14 oz so far, and the diet coke. I'll definitely be drinking more later though.

Thoughts
I bought a juicer today! I'm so excited. I got the omega VRT350, the refurbished one from Amazon. It still comes with a 7 year warranty instead of the 10 year but it's $100 cheaper and I'm sure whatever could go wrong with the refurbishment will happen long before that. Plus it was a compromise with husband because he was really taken aback with the $380 original price tag. 

I think once it arrives I'm going to try the Fully Raw 14 day challenge and I'm so excited already.

Anyone have advice on juicing?

Xoxo little birds

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Thursday June 5


I'm kinda old. Not old, but older than some of you teenage whippersnappers and I finished high school 9 years ago, college 5 years ago, grad school 1 year ago.

Lectures are different now to me than they were when I was in school full time. They're still an occasional part of my training but my perspective has changed.

I used to have a much higher tolerance for lectures that didn't completely hold my interest. When they were my whole life and I didn't have much to do but go to lecture I feel like it was easier to just take notes or study during lecture. 

Now that I'm in my dream job if feel like I have much higher standards for my time. If a lecture isn't useful to me I try to be respectful, but I also value my time a lot more. I'll leave, or start working on something else, because I'm trying to be my best and when something isn't useful, I need to respect myself enough to not waste my time.

Ok that's just what lecture today got me thinking about.

Intake
Smoothie
Veggie sandwich, fries
2 fried zucchini slices
Popcorn
Beer x2, bugs bunny (that's vodka+carrot juice - no I didn't make it up google it it's real :)
Apricot x2
Few grape tomatoes
2 carrots with hummus

Activity
Walking to work. As usual, that's it :)

Hydration
Not really sure - I was super thirsty at work today but didn't have time to go get water. I think it might have been as low as like 25 oz. The alcohol didn't count obviously.

Thoughts
I'm currently watching some trashy reality TV and pretty soon I'm going to get some naked time with my man before we pass out for the night. I'm tired all the time - as I've been talking about, but since I'm relaxed right now I guess I'm happy. 

Love you all, be good

Xoxo little birds

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Wednesday June 4


I can't thank you all enough for commenting about my activity and your reassurances it meant a lot.

I didn't do any extra activity besides walking around Costco - I know a lot of you aren't in the US, do you have costco? It's a warehouse style store where you can buy things in bulk. I get 64 oz of Naked Juice, or 4 lb of strawberries, soy milk 3 quarts at a time etc. there's certain things we always buy there.

It was still a busy day. Morning feels so early when my alarm goes off at 5, I leave at 6:10 but I rarely get up when my alarm goes off. I'm pretty proud I've still been managing to make a smoothie every morning - sometimes not getting in a shower though and saving it for evening, are my priorities off?

Intake
Smoothie
Rice and veg with cashew Caesar sauce, apple, apricot
Larabar Uber
Sautéed zucchini, sourdough bread with olive oil and cherry balsamic
White wine x2 glasses

Activity
Just the usual walk to work

Hydration
Not awesome today - I didn't have a water bottle with me at work. I think I'm at only 30 oz, I'll have another 14 before bed though.

Thoughts
I'm still so tired when I wake up. I feel like I need to make a core change but I don't know what it is. I've been loving the videos and meal plans on fullyraw.com these past few days, even though I'm not following along I still feel like its inspirational and good ideas for the future. Other than that I have an unheard of 2 days off in a row this weekend so just 2 more days before I get some rest time.

Xoxo little birds

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Tuesday June 3


Looong day today, not bad at all just long. Right now I'm lying in bed and about to go to sleep. Husband's staying up for a bit and I'm really ready to pass out, I've been home for about 10 mins all day and otherwise pretty busy. Work from 6:30 AM until almost 7 PM, then church small group and I'm finally home.

Intake
Smoothie
Thai tofu, rice, broccoli
Larabar Uber - coconut flavor
Farmers Market Sub, salad, glass wine, out with church group
Energy ball

Activity
Again, just the walk to work and back

Hydration
70ish? I swear I drank a ton today, but I was so thirsty and I still feel like I needed more. It's really hot here.

Thoughts
I really really want to be able to update you tomorrow with some activity, however small, beyond just my normal activities. I'm so tired after being up and about all day but it also felt awesome, and I'm really excited to sleep.

Xoxo little birds

Monday, June 2, 2014

Monday June 2


Today at work was pretty okay, I'm getting back into the groove of my routine and I just feel like I'm doing better at work I guess.

Intake
Smoothie
Tofu veggie scramble, apple
Energy balls x2
Beer x1
Homemade vegan pizza (if this looks familiar, it's a Monday tradition)

Activity
I only walked on the way to work, I had my man pick me up at the end of the day cause it was crazy hot

Hydration
40ish but I'm going to have another 12-14 before bed

Thoughts
I've been watching the 14 day Bikini Body series through Fully Raw Kristina (fullyraw.com) and I think I might try going raw soon, just for a while. Not gourmet raw, but 801010 - tons of fruit and veg. I think long term doing it 100% wouldn't really work out for my goals, but I want to try it before I decide that for sure.

Xoxo little birds

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Sunday June 1


June? June!? 

You've got to be kidding me.

I picked up my tablet to do my post today and could not for the life of me remember if I'd posted yesterday, but then I remembered Sam and melrose's comments and I thought, no, I did post, and it was sure nice to hear for both of you today.

Work was busy but ok.

Mostly I'm just shocked its June.

I got done a couple hours early at work and got to do some more productive organization and cleaning of my house and also we went over to a friend's house to watch Game of Thrones so it was actually pretty ok for a weekend day I had to work.

Intake
Smoothie
Spinach salad
French fries
Energy ball x2
Beer x1
Banana
Apricot
Mushroom fajita tacos with black beans
Popcorn
Brownies (too many) - one of my friends altered her recipe and made them vegan just for me

Activity
Just the walking to work.

Hydration
Not nearly enough at work today, but lots since. Probably 48 ish total.

Thoughts
Still shocked its June. Excited though. Happy new month! 

What are your goals?

Xoxo little birds